A Day Without A Woman

Today thousands of women across the U.S. are participating in ” A Day Without a Woman” led by the Women’s March Movement as a part of International Women’s Day.

They are asking participants to…

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Of course not everyone is going to be able to take a day off of work. Many of us cherish our sick days/ vacation days and can’t randomly take time off. Wearing red in solidarity, showing support through social media, and having conversations with friends and family is great way to contribute to the cause.

While I don’t have a job to take a day off from and I don’t make many purchases ( I’m a cheapskate) I will be wearing red and talking about women’s rights! Other great ways to celebrate international women’s day are donating to organizations that support women’s/reproductive rights and supporting female artists.

International Women’s Day is a day to celebrate ALL women. Queer women, trans women, women of color, disabled and chronically ill women, religious women, immigrant women, women in poverty, all women. Don’t leave any women out of your celebration or activism!

How are you celebrating International Women’s Day or A Day Without a Woman?

Lots of Love,

Alyssa

 

 

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People Don’t Have to Like You

Like most people I used to care a lot about  what others think about me.

Now not so much.

I want people close to me to like what I’m doing and the choices I make, but at the end of the day only my opinion and God’s opinion of me really matters in my eyes. Being liked is nice, but not everyone is gonna like you. There are quite a few people I don’t care for or don’t want to be around, and it’s okay for someone else not to like me.

Around those I’m not really close to I can be withdrawn and quiet. I’m an introvert, but I’m often loud and animated around people I know well. When I do let my opinionated and sarcastic attitude through some people don’t like it, and that’s okay. There are people who don’t understand sarcasm and think those whose it are just being rude, and others simply don’t like it. People  have permission to not like you, it doesn’t make them a bad person, or mean, their personality just doesn’t mesh well with yours and thats okay.

On the other hand, you don’t have to like everyone you meet. It’s okay to meet someone once and know you won’t be best fiends. Every once in a while you’ll meet someone you don’t care for at first and end of being friends later, but it doesn’t happen very often. I usually know if I’m going to really get along with someone within five minutes of meeting them. I try to continue to give people a chance, but I can be picky when it comes to friends. I get annoyed easily and can be pessimistic. I like to think I just know what I want and don’t want in a friend. I’ve had too many friendships that I was giving more than I was getting or I cared about the person much more than they cared about me, and I don’t want to do that again.

Now when I can tell someone isn’t into being around me, I don’t sweat it. That’s their opinion and I think they’re just missing out. If someone doesn’t like me, I probably wouldn’t like them either. There’s 7.5 billion people on this planet if one doesn’t like you, you’re gonna be okay.

Lots of Love,

Alyssa

Putting Ourselves in Boxes

The LGBTQ+ community does something I’ve never been able to understand.

We put ourselves in boxes.

Lesbians are categorized into femmes, butch, chapstick, lipstick, soft butch, stone butch, stem, and the list keeps going. Gay guys are also categorized, but by body type, and amount body hair, which is even more confusing to me. From bears and otters to jocks and “clean cut,” to probably a hundred other terms I’ve never heard of. If society is so set on putting us into boxes, then why are we doing it to ourselves?

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“What does she look like?”  Oh you know she’s like a 5.7599 on the butch scale
I don’t think there’s any harm in identifying as a femme or a butch girl, but why does it matter? Gender presentation, is just that, a presentation. You aren’t getting any more information from one of these labels then you can from justing looking at the person. Being a “femme” doesn’t mean you have a certain personality or act a certain way. All it tells someone is that you dress more femininely. So why do we use these words to describe ourselves?

Queer guys classifications confuse me even more. How does someones weight or amount of hair effect their personality? It doesn’t. If we aren’t getting much information from these labels, then why do we use them? Being a “baby gay” and getting thrown into a world of slang and labels can be very confusing. I felt like I need to identify with one of these terms, but I didn’t feel comfortable labeling myself with any of them, and that’s okay. If you feel caught up in the world of labels, just know you don’t have to pick one or even fit into a certain label.

Each of these terms carries stereotypes about the persons character traits, and their general demeanor. The Queer community deals with enough stereotypes from the rest of society, so I just don’t get why we would do it to ourselves. I personally don’t want to have to fight societies ideas of what lesbian is or looks like, along with other queer girls ideas of how I should look or act based of being a more feminine presenting lesbian.

I find these terms unnecessary, and don’t really see their use, but if someone else wants to use them, it doesn’t offend me.  Do you use these terms to describe yourself or your friends? Let me know if you do like these terms, and why they are important to you. I’m open to all sides, and would love to hear your view!

Lots of Love,

Alyssa