Life Update: Withdrawing from College

This semester has been incredibly rough for me.

Some of it I have shared with you, like documenting my journey at the Mayo Clinic, but there’s been a lot going on that I haven’t talked about yet. My health has been very poor since around the last few weeks of Fall Semester, and has been continuously getting worse. This was one of the major reasons I chose to go to Mayo in the middle of Spring semester. Unfortunately I missed a lot of class before my trip, and then a whole week for the trip (my first trip was during spring-break so I didn’t miss any class for that). While I was successful in obtaining multiple diagnoses, the treatment options are very limited.

As of right now, they are mainly focusing on the lifestyle changes; things like exercise, following the gastroparesis diet, and eating tons of salt. These things may or may not work, and if they do work it’s going to be months before I see any improvement. Since returning from my trip, I’ve only become more symptomatic and much less functional. I’m honestly not sure what to do right now, since I know if I contact the Mayo doctors they will probably tell me to just keep trying to do these things since it hasn’t been long enough to see results, but at the same time my body is incredibly weak and doing simple life tasks can be very difficult.

Missing this much school has seriously affected my grades. Some of my professors have been great, and others have been awful. I have disability services, but they aren’t very helpful and professors have found loop holes that essentially disregard any accommodations I’m supposed to have. It’s crazy how little legal protection disabled people have, but that’s a whole nother can of worms. I made the decision to withdraw from college, since my Spring semester grades were going to tank my GPA. I really wanted to only withdraw from the two classes I was doing poorly in, and stay in the two classes that I had nearly perfect grades in, but that isn’t an option at my college.

This also means I will not be able to transfer to a University in the Fall. I won’t have nearly enough hours after I lose these 14. Now, I’m going to have to do at least one more semester at community college, maybe two. I’m trying my best to remind myself that I’m only 18, so I’m actually ahead of my peers by at least one college semester, but withdrawing makes me feel so behind. There’s a lot of emotions to process, and I’m doing my best not to fall into a pit of despair, but it’s been really tough. I think hope and positivity are important when it comes to living as a chronically ill person, but I also think it’s okay to recognize that some situations just suck.

I’m planing to return to college in Fall, or even take a Summer class if I’m able to get my health under control enough. As difficult as this decision is, I know it is the right one. This is not the first time I’ve had to withdraw from school, as many of you know, I started this blog right after I withdrew from high school in November of 2016. It’s crazy to think that almost 18 months later I’m having to do the exact same thing. I’ve got to say it doesn’t hurt any less the second time around, but I know from the first time that it will get better.

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12 thoughts on “Life Update: Withdrawing from College

  1. I’m so sorry to hear this. I know on a personal level how difficult it is having to drop out of school, in a situation that was actually kind of similar to yours. I had to drop out of law school after my first year. I was having a ton of digestive issues (which I later found was gastroparesis). It was an awful feeling. I felt like a failure. It was so difficult to watch the rest of my friends get on with their lives, while I felt like I was just standing still, or even moving backwards. I hoped after a couple months I would get my situation figured out and return to school. I wasn’t finding answers for my health situation, and eventually a couple months turned into a semester, and then into a year. Eventually I went to Mayo, received a diagnosis, and focused on getting better.

    I was able to return to law school after a year, although that first semester was rough. I jumped the gun and went back sooner than I should have, but I so badly just wanted to get on with my life. But stepping back for that year was the right thing to do. Life is short, but there’s so much time to do what you want to do.

    You’ll find a way back to school when you’re ready. Tomorrow you can worry about tomorrow. Today it’s okay to just be bummed.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you! I’m glad you were able to go back to Law school. My education is so important to me, but at the same time if my health isn’t good then I can’t focus on my education as much as I should. I’m hoping taking this time to focus on my health, will put me in a good position to start classes back in the fall!

      I hope you’re doing well!

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  2. Sorry your health is so bad at the moment, I hope that the treatments help even if they take time. It’s so frustrating when you have to wait and see if these things are even going to work. I dropped out of the college course I was starting when I was 18, tried to keep up with the work but only actually managed a few days in the first term, and took a couple of years before I could even do my long distance degree which I finished when I was 26. It’s hard to accept, especially as it’s so recent and raw at the moment, but there will be people of all ages doing degrees. This is just a bit of a delay but in the long run your health is definitely the most important. Sorry this got a bit long! Hope you start to see some improvement soon.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. 😦 I’m sorry things aren’t going as well as you were hoping your semester would, and I wish there was something I could do to help even though I’m just a random internet person. I don’t suppose you’d want a free tarot reading…?

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you! Random internet people are some of my favorite people. As for the tarot card reading, I wouldn’t feel right about taking a service from you that I was not able to pay for, but that is a very kind gesture!

      Like

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